Nov. 2020; 5 types of people

There are 5 types of people in the world. That’s it.” So I used to know a lady several years ago. She was a regular customer at the bar I used to play, sometimes with colleagues, sometimes alone. She was always well dressed, early 30’s, very well educated, good mannered, mid level manager at Tencent, perhaps a little too serious at times but generally very pleasant nonetheless. During one conversation I remember I mentioned an African friend of mine who had recently been caught selling narcotics around Shenzhen. (I never actually knew this was how he made his income, I just knew he was a student at the university.) After only a few minutes discussing this, she said something that made my jaw hit the floor. “Well, no surprise really,” she remarked. This lady was inferring that because he was African, it goes hand in hand with breaking the law in this manner. People who know me understand that as much as I try to remain tactful and try not rise to the bait of peoples words, when it comes to some subjects I can fly off the handle pretty damn fast. She’d managed it. Quickly the conversation got very heated, profanities were used, voices were raised and eventually lowered. Tempers simmered. Now when people say things that I may conceive as ignorant, rude, inappropriate or just plain stupid, before I let rip at them I try to fathom out what made them say that or feel that way. Was it some deep rooted prejudice or bias, was it learned behaviour from a parent or some other senior, or was it just someone repeating what they’d heard or read some place. But this was a woman of very good education, and yet she was vehemently unapologetic for her blatant racism.

As the conversation progressed, she hit me with the sentence that I’ve unfortunately heard dozens upon dozens of times since, and which to this day I usually find absolutely ridiculous; “Foreigners don’t understand Chinese culture.” Seriously, she was justifying her attitude towards African people, or any people of colour, not as racism, but as culture. Then she continued. “There 5 types of people in the world. That’s it. And we understand them. There are Chinese people, Indian people, blacks, foreigners, and Japanese.” Yep, you read that correctly. This well educated ladies’ view of the worlds people went as far as that. Her mind had 5 boxes for the 5 types of the planets 7-plus billion human inhabitants, all neatly categorised by personality, culture, colour and habit. Her perception, and unfortunately that also held by many other people I’ve encountered in the last decade, is that all “foreigners” thought and acted in near exactly the same way. (One thing I’ve learned over my lifetime is that a formal education, a prestigious university, does not equate to a good person, nor for that matter an intelligent person.)

Another thing I’ve learned over my time on this big rock is that the most biased and prejudiced people are usually the ones who’ve had the least amount of exposure to different people and cultures. Talk to a person who is well travelled, perhaps lived in a few different countries, and you’ll meet an open minded and understanding human being. I find it fascinating that many peoples’ perception of others is (of course) based almost purely on their own personal experiences. “I went on holiday to Scotland and all the people I met were lovely, therefore all Scots are lovely.” Um, no. I’m sure some people thought Hitler was pretty lovely, too. Every place, every country and city, has their fair share of adorable people, and their fair share of total arseholes. Intelligent and open minded people, and morons dumb as rocks. But somehow, often we choose to be blinded by our own brand of self righteousness, and choose to perceive people based on our own previous experiences. I went to Spain and my camera got stolen, therefore all Spaniards are theives?… And that’s what today’s Sunday scribble is very loosely based on; Perception.

During this last week, the world has had a little shake now that Old McDonald Trump has got the boot, and yet another old white man has taken his place. (Why oh why is the world run by old men, all harbouring their own personal ideals and discriminations. Most people have to retire at 65, why can’t politicians?) I’m not going to throw names around about old Donald, but many people clearly feel he wasn’t the right person for the job. And during his time in power, he hasn’t exactly improved how people perceive US citizens worldwide. I’ve actually met people from the US who, when asked where they are from, will say somewhere else to avoid the invariable derogatory remarks that ensue. Living as an expat in another country, you get to rub shoulders with all sorts of people you would never normally meet in your own corner of the world. There has even been people I’ve become friends with, who you would never even acknowledge back in your own city. 10 years ago, when there were far fewer westerners in Shenzhen, and I would crave conversations with other English speakers, just to talk about things we could associate with, our joys and frustrations with living here, all the good and bad stuff you’d feel awkward to talk about with a Chinese friend for fear of possibly offending them or unwittingly saying something ignorant. And looking back a decade ago, I was also often guilty of lumping in all Chinese people together with my discourteous and ill-informed opinions. Now I’ve lived away from the UK for over 11 years and I’ve grown and absorbed, been around thousands of people I never would have otherwise, I now understand that nearly all of our differences of attitude, behaviour, opinions, prejudices and so on, are personal differences, not cultural ones.

But we just love to stereotype. We love to pigeon-hole people from different countries or ethnicities, even people within our own country, and label them as we see fit. Ask many people in Asia what they think of the French, and they’ll reply with “romantic.” Ask someone from England and they’ll most likely say “arrogant.” Well, I’ve met arrogant French people and I’ve met incredibly romantic French people too. That’s the thing, we may have these loose (mis)understandings about a certain group of people, but that’s exactly it, only a very loose generalisation. Germans have no sense of humour; I cried laughing from listening to a German guy I met in Dongguan. Japanese people are shy and don’t like westerners; Once in Fukuoka a proper OG yakuza gent walked up to me, complimented me on my tattoos, showed me his, and insisted on buying me an ice cream. Shanghai people think they are above everybody else; I have actually encountered this just once, compared to the scores of fantastic and humble Shanghai people I’ve also met. When we meet someone for the first time, usually one of the introductory questions that presents itself is “where are you from?” Now, is this to try to gain a better understanding about that place and it’s people, or to immediately bring up our own preconceived ideas and opinions about them? Here’s an exercise to try; Italians. What comes to mind that isn’t based on food, mafia, or opera? Previously when people found out I was from England they’d often reply with “fish and chips! Raining. Manchester United.” Whereas now they laughingly say “Brexit! Hahaha!!”

In my over ten years living abroad I’ve really discovered that you meet the best, and the worst people in another country. I’ve met the best Russians and the absolute worst. I’ve met amazing Australians and absolute piece of crap Australians. And trust me, I’ve met delightful English people, and real scum English too. Dignity, kindness, understanding, humour and humanity does not have a nationality or ethnicity, nor does ignorance, greed, selfishness, cruelty or prejudice. Time and time again, people here have asked me “what do you like most about China?” I don’t ever need to think about it, my answer has been the same for a decade. The people. I’ve met the sweetest, selfless, most caring and open minded people here, people I hope to have in my life for the rest of it. The togetherness of society during the ongoing pandemic is something the rest of the world could learn from. But my answer for the almost-always following question, “what is the worst thing about living in China?” unsurprisingly has the same answer. The people. Some of the stories I’ve read and heard about, the treatment of animals and the Yulin festival, the social injustices, the mistreatment of children and family members and people literally poisoning each other for a small profit is enough to turn my stomach. But that’s the world we live in. Every country has the very good, the very bad, and everything in between. There’s no acts of pure selflessness or terrible inhumanity we read about here that couldn’t or wouldn’t happen anywhere else in the world.

One thing that photography has taught me, is that when you see a photograph, the picture you see says a lot more about the photographer than the subject. If you see someone sneakily taking photos of girls on the beach in bikinis, we can safely presume pervy old man. But if you see a photograph of a homeless person or someone in need, someone in pain, what does that say about the person who took that photo? What was their reasoning? This is how I see people who say ignorant, hurtful or prejudiced remarks about others. It’s not the subject of their words that I take in, it’s the person saying them. Next time you hear people talking in a negative or vituperative manner about others, think twice about what makes that person tick. What opinions and beliefs are in that persons mind. You really don’t need people like that in your life. Your friends are the family you choose. Choose wisely.